Dear Republicans: After the Election

Dear Republican:  After the Election

[Satire warning!]


Ahhhhhh... I get up every morning and everything I do, every fact I encounter, every bit of independent research I read is...BIASED if is not in agreement with Republican values & beliefs. If the research was conducted by an independent company and comes to a non-R conclusion, it & I am biased.

Every day, for the rest of my life, in the view of my Republican friends and family, I am a deluded, biased moron. So, today, I got up and began my life, as I do every day, as a deluded biased moron.


Yes, as you can imagine, I have been fortifying myself with more & more Kool-Aid for the past year--I didn't drink enough during previous years nor as a child. Because, as we all know, there are only a few reasons that anyone in the USA could vote for Democrats and one major reason is that they "drank the Kool-Aid." So, I have restocked my Kool-Aid shelves.

My poor parents -- and, myself! -- think of all the money we wasted on education, science classes, research courses, reading the newspaper, learning to think reasonably and rationally. All wasted.

Republicans claim that it is impossible for anyone but Republicans to be thinking, logical, reasonable voters. Why, I hear that all the time on Republican FB pages, radio, Fox News,  and web-sites, so it must be true! However, since Republicans do not believe in science, math, or reading any independent journalism... If only my parents had known I was going to be a deluded moron, anyway! Oh, wait, they were deluded moronic Democrats, too.
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So, I have restocked my Kool-Aid shelves. I begin my life as a slavering idiot--as is 51% of the population -- according to Republicans.

And, yes, it is my goal to foster the "gimme gimme" culture! Why would I have any other goal?  After all, my entire family worked like dogs, lived on next to nothing, never considered themselves poor, were painfully honest and so charitable, it makes me cry to remember. I lived in 500 sq. ft. -- why wouldn't I want to foster a gimme gimme culture! It is my total goal in life to foster dependence.

And, destroy America. Yes, I want to destroy America, destroy marriage (honestly, my husband & I have done more toward that end... another story...), destroy Christianity, destroy the Capitol... I am a one woman wrecking crew. God, I am powerful... OK, forward!

After all, the only people in the world who are true pioneers, who accomplished everything all alone, who are masters of achievement and accomplishment are Republicans. They are out there raising Victory gardens, hunting squirrels... loaning money to their children, borrowing from their parents... In fact, I heard that they are the only ones who survived the Great Depression, fought in WWI, WWII or Vietnam, pay taxes, and have gas or poop.

But, I will continue to vote for hand outs for those sorry slackers--the 5-10% of the population who are severely & chronically mentally ill & who Republicans seem to think should have been working and earning a living--as CEO's perhaps!

I will vote for the 10% of the population with IQ in the Borderline & Below Normal Range! Why haven't those bums become CEO's of Bane Capital ... thinking...  Let Republican successful business men get them high paying skilled jobs on the boards of directors of Bane Capital or as... airplane traffic controllers!

Oh, yeah... I have been out there voting for those sorry lay-abouts who are paralyzed from the neck down, have severe and unstable diabetes and other problems like that -- to receive disability payments.

I will vote for our great public institutions because I damn well do not want to pave my own street or educate my child through high school.

Hmmm... yes, I vote for those who have no bootstraps, no boots, and sometimes no feet. No car, no presentable clothing, no food, no running water, no car to borrow, no money for gas, no health care, no dental care... because I know them personally. But, my R friends, who have never met anyone poorer than a laid off teacher, do not believe this level of poverty exist, so they believe I am demented.

I have been voting for retirement. People used to drop dead at the job. Perhaps Republicans would like to be role models and go first?

Oh, I just love you so much! It is my prayer that you will learn some modesty. That you will be grateful for all that you were born with and given. That you will have the life-altering experience of watching a few children go hungry -- day after day after day. That you will spend some time some where that there is no industry, no jobs, a rotten educational system, no decent health care.

And, for Jesus sake learn some logic and learn something about research or STFU! Jesus! You are getting on my nerves!

Love love love

Vivian