Dear Conservative Media Owners Everywhere!

Dear Alleged Journalists a.k.a. Conservative Media Owners Everywhere,

"Conservative Media Owners?" Hmmm... Isn't that a redundancy?

Yes. Dear Media Owners Everywhere: Shame on Gannett Wisconsin Media and Wisconsin State Journal, Green Bay Press Gazette, Appleton Post-Crescent, and Oshkosh Northwestern

Shame on you for even using the Tea Party organized Verify the Recall site to search for your own employees and question their professional integrity in exercising their constitutional right to sign a recall petition--it is NOT activism. It is voting.

Shame on you for "outing" 29 Circuit Court Judges for exercising their right to vote by signing a recall petition.

I could not help but notice that you showed your partiality by endorsing Scott Walker. Oh, wait... The newspapers can endorse publicly without their ethics being questioned but their employees and judges cannot sign a petition without their ethics being challenged? What's that about?

Oh, I love you and I could just kiss you on the lips and hug you 'round the neck--really tightly. Really, truly, very tightly. Ahhhh, if only I could get my hands on you! I would just show you some unconditional love! Don't thank me-it's a gift!

Because you completely, totally, absolutely lack the hallmark of one who has the capacity for love: empathy! You do not have the ability to see the other side at all do you? How is marriage working out for you? Parenthood? You drink too much and work too hard, don't you?

But, so much of my commitment to unconditional love is teaching! Did you know that? Yes, I would like to discipline you as in "provide training that corrects, molds, or perfects the mental faculties or moral character." I want to help you! You lucky devils!

Because, your behavior just constantly reflects that you have suffered a severe lack of training and you have no moral character that I or anyone else can discern. Oh, I hope I didn't hurt your feelings!

The concern I have is that WE CAN SEE YOU! The whole world is watching. We know that you have the moral development of a garden snail. And, I am embarrassed for you. Because I do love you-you and I are one.

But, I am just the person to train you. Discipline you. Be your teacher. Have you as my disciple--my very own pupil. I am tingling all over--how about you?

The word "discipline" makes me tingle all over!

I think I can teach you a few things. Some rules of life that your parents didn't have time for. Did they teach you anything at all? What? It wasn't the Golden Rule... Thinking... Ahhh! Good grooming! OK... I can work with that. It's a start!

Lesson number one: "Black and white" thinking is not a good thing. This is also called "all or nothing" thinking and is typical of very young children. It is the thought or belief that something or someone is all bad or all good. It is, in fact, a symptom of personality disorders (in the individual) and fascism (in the nation). It is called dichotomous thinking.

So, thinking, writing, and actions which reveal values such as: ALL Republicans are good and ALL Democrats are bad; EVERYONE who signed the RECALL petition is bad and EVERYONE who didn't is good; ALL Conservative thinking is good and ALL Liberal thinking is bad reveals you to be a simple minded moron incapable of navigating the complex world we live in and solving the sophisticated problems we deal with on a daily basis. It makes you look stupid, dear.

As your teacher, I have the solutions for you: 1. Get out of your intellectual box by turning off Fox and watching pretty much anything else. And, read a newspaper for Godiva's sake-from another country, preferably. 2. Get out of your social box--meet some vile liberals. Drinks? Coffee? The open house tomorrow at 6pm? Downtown Janesville? 3. Travel. See the world. Visit a third world country--and don't come back.

Lesson number two will be a really bitter pill and it will hurt. Forever. Here it is. But, first: Breath deeply for 3 minutes. Maybe take an Advil. OK: The door swings both ways--and I am not talking bi-sexuality, here. Don't forget to breathe:

IF SIGNING THE RECALL PETITION IS A POLITICAL ACT, THEN NOT SIGNING THE RECALL PETITION IS ALSO A POLITICAL ACT.

If you can question the professional integrity of journalists, politicians, candidates and used car salesmen who signed a RECALL WALKER petition, THEN I can question the professional integrity of journalists, newspaper owners, politicians, candidates and used care salesmen who did NOT sign a RECALL WALKER petition.

In fact, my case is stronger: How can I trust one word in a newspaper that openly endorses candidates in every election--especially when the vast majority of those candidates always belong to the same party? Of course, I can't and neither can anyone else.

What, more swinging door lessons? If conservatives can endorse candidates in non-partisan elections--then they have no reason to be offended when Democrats endorse or show support for candidates.

That door keeps swinging! If Republicans can have their very own TV station, Liberals can have a few shows every evening on one cable network. Honestly, you people are just hogs at a trough!

Of course, right now someone is saying, "Why didn't she say, 'And vice versa,' because the libs demeaned us first and worst and they are uglier and they say worser things than we do and...'"

And, honestly, you will get along better with your partners, your children, and your employees when you learn a little empathy--that means the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes and feel and think what they are feeling and thinking. That's the final lesson for today.

So, just imagine how this is all going to feel when the shoe is on the other foot!

Oh, I love you! I really, really do. BFF!

Your friend,

Vivian